UNLIKELY HEROES

    		I awoke to nature’s call.  The taste in my mouth confirmed that I’d drank a lot of beer before falling asleep.  It was dark, and I had no idea what time it was.  There on the bank of the Ohio River, the water looked like it went on forever in the moonlight. 

I was cold. The campfire was in danger of going out. Mike and Ronnie were quietly snoring. I stumbled to the appointed tree, and felt relief as I pissed. It was a cloudless night, and with a nearly full moon, it wasn’t difficult to see.

Ronnie was sitting passed out in a lawn chair.  I shoved my foot against Mike in his 

sleeping bag and said, “Mike. . . Mike. . . Wake up. We need more firewood.”

“(mumble) my truck (mumble, mumble). . . “ Looked like I was on my own.

There was a place where several trees had slipped down the bank and into the river.  Before it had gotten dark, we’d noticed some driftwood on the other side them.  We weren’t in an approved camping location, and we knew there was a boat ramp just a little ways downstream.  The trees kept us hidden from view of anyone at the boat ramp.  As late as it was, it surprised me when I saw a pair of headlights.  They were just sitting there, not moving.
Ronnie woke up when I put the wood in the fire.  He asked, “What time is it, John?”  
“Half past a monkey’s ass and quarter till its balls.  How the heck should I know?  I don’t have a watch.”  

Ronnie looked over at Mike, and kicked him. He woke up and Ronnie asked him the time. “Just after 3 am.” “Damn,” I said, “There’s a car down at the boat ramp.” Mike sat up. “What’s it doing?” Ronnie asked. “Just sitting there.” “Lets go check it out!” Mike said. I told him he was nuts. “Dude, whoever it is ain’t supposed to be there,” said Ronnie. “We’ll just sneak up on them.“ “Maybe they’re having sex!” Mike climbed out of his sleeping bag. “Damn, that could be really hot.” Ronnie got up and we all started walking that direction. When we got to the trees, the car was still there. Then, the lights went out. I asked, “What the heck?” “Maybe its stolen and somebody’s dumping it,” Ronnie said. We climbed over the pile of driftwood and jogged down the shoreline. Ronnie said, “As long as we keep our lights out and stay close to the bank, they can’t see us.” “They could have guns!” said Mike. “That’s why we’re hiding, dumb ass.” We were constantly losing sight and getting it back again as we stayed close to the bank. Finally, we got to the small cove near the boat ramp. We could hear engines idling. We crawled up and tried to look without any of our bodies showing. We could hear voices. There was a Camaro at the top of the ramp pointed at the river. There was a small sporty truck backed up against it. The passenger’s door was open on the truck; the driver’s door was open on the Camaro. “C’mon!” yelled the driver of the truck, “that’s good enough!” The guy by the Camaro leaned out of the car and right before he closed the door, I saw someone in it. He ran and got into the truck. The truck backed up and bumped the car, making it start to roll. “What the hell?” said Ronnie. “There’s someone in that car!” Mike said. “If we do anything, we’re next!” Ronnie said. The truck stayed until the car hit the water, squealed tires, and took off. All three of us ran toward the car, which was now going into the river. Ronnie, the tallest, got to the driver’s door. “IT’S LOCKED!” he yelled, “THERE’S SOMEONE IN THERE!” I ran up so fast, I ran into the back of the car. When I did, the hatch moved. It wasn’t latched. I lifted it up and climbed in, head first. I could see someone in the driver’s seat. I started climbing forward. I saw the water in the floorboards. Then, I heard the hatch close behind me. Water was against the windows. I grabbed the parking brake between the seats and yanked. The car stopped moving, but the water was against the windshield. It was still leaking in. It was getting deeper in the car. I heard Ronnie banging on the roof. “OPEN THE T-TOP!” he yelled. I moved a lever on the ceiling. Ronnie pulled the t-top off and threw it. The driver was unconscious. He had a muscular build, and was only a few years older than the rest of us. I unbuckled his seat belt. Ronnie reached down, and a wave came in through the roof. “There’s a barge passing. The waves are moving the car,” Mike said, “We’ve GOT to get you OUT of there!” Ronnie and Mike hauled the young man out. I crawled out right after him. I felt the car sliding deeper, despite the parking brake. Mike helped me get out. We all scrambled up the boat ramp and collapsed. The young man was waking up. There was blood in his gelled hair. His eyes were unfocused. “What the fuck. .. where the fuck. . . “ he said.

“Sorry about your car man,” said Ronnie.  The young man looked up, just as the back bumper went under water.

“That’s not my car,” he said, “that’s a Camaro.”

“Not your car?” I asked.  “Then who’s is it?  How’d you get in it?  Who are you?”
“Dustin Crittenden.  I don’t know who’s car that is.  Or how I got in it.  Where the fuck am I?  Dude. . . The last thing I remember is this party. . . And Scott, and Lucas. . .Who the fuck are you guys?”
“I’m John.  This is Mike and Ronnie.  We were camping upstream when we saw something going on down here.  This is the Green River boat ramp, in Madison County.”  His eyes got wide.

“Madison County? Indiana? In bum fuck?” he asked.

“Yep.  Bum fuck.  Where are you from?” Ronnie said.
“Douglas Hills.  Louisville.  So. . . How did I get in the river?  It’s fucking cold, man.”

“Lets get back to the fire, so we can dry off. We don’t want to get hypothermia,” said Mike.

By the time we got back to the campfire, we were all shivering.  Ronnie had some towels in his truck from swimming.  He also started the truck so we could use the heater.  We found out that Dustin had moved to Louisville recently.  His dad was a big-time executive.  Dustin had said that the car he’d saw go under was “Some old cheap-o Camaro.”  We hadn’t mentioned to him that it was more than any of us could afford.  Dustin had found some guys to hang out with and went to a party with them earlier that night.  After that, he didn’t know what had happened.  We told him about the sport truck we’d seen and the two guys.  He thought he knew who they were.

“They tried to fucking kill me,” he said. We told him he had to tell the cops. We were worried about us three getting caught drinking and trespassing. We decided on a story where the three of us had been out just driving around and found Dustin walking. He’d gotten out of the car himself; we’d just picked him up. He wouldn’t even say our names; we’d just drop him off at the police station and take off. We gave him our phone numbers in case he needed anything. He seemed real understanding, and after we’d dried off some, and the truck was warm inside, we loaded up and left for town. The sun was on its way up by then.

Four of us were tight in that old truck cab.  The whole way there, Mike and I told Dustin he should go to a doctor or something; the knock on his head had him acting funny.  Ronnie didn’t say much.  Dustin kept assuring us he would be alright.  

After we dropped Dustin off, the three of us were silent. Then, Ronnie turned right onto Maple. Mike asked him where we were going. “My uncle. He lives at the end of the street. My aunt works in the police station.”

“And why are we going there?” I asked.
“Something seems fishy, okay?” said Ronnie.
Ronnie’s uncle was a real cool guy.  He worked on old cars.  He was retired from the military.  He didn’t care if Ronnie drank or not.  Ronnie’s aunt worked at the police station.  Ronnie told his uncle what had happened and asked him a favor.  Ronnie’s uncle called his wife and made a bit of small talk; mentioned some groceries and stuff.  Then, he asked if anything interesting had happened that morning.  Apparently, nothing had happened.  Nothing at all.  Just another boring morning.
“He didn’t go to the cops,” said Mike, “Why didn’t he go to the cops?”
“Maybe his head was hurt worse than we thought.  I mean, he was real-“

“Stoned!” said Mike. “That’s what he was. He was on something, I’m telling you. I couldn’t say anything with him around, but I’m telling you, he was on something. He’s a dope head.”

“That ain’t worth him getting killed over,” I said. 

“If he’s into drugs,” said Ronnie’s uncle, “you don’t know what all he’s into. You’ve got to find this guy.”

“Why?  I mean, I don’t understand.“ I asked.
“Look, from what you guys are telling me, some people tried to kill him.  He’s afraid to go to the police.  If these two guys find him, they’re going to want to finish the job.  But first, they’re going to want to know why he’s not dead.  If he tells those two murderers about you three, they’re going to want to kill all of you just to cover it all up.  You’ve got to find this guy.”
We all gave some thought as to where Dustin would be.  He didn’t have a car, his clothes were a mess, but he did have a wallet.  He’d dried it out and in the process we’d seen some cash and credit cards.  It had added to the mystery, since we thought sure the bad guys would have robbed him.  We’d chalked it up to them being smart enough to not want evidence on them.  At any rate, we knew Dustin was loaded and even though we’d dried out some, we were all still damp.  All of us could go home and change clothes, but Dustin lived way over in Louisville.  We all decided he’d go to the store to buy clothes.  In our small town, that was really just one store.  All of us went to find him.  We were pretty mad that he’d lied to us.

As we were walking in, Dustin was walking out. His eyes got wide, and he said, “Hey, uh, guys, wow. . . I didn’t expect-“ “We gotta talk,” said Ronnie. We escorted Dustin to the truck, and we went to go find somewhere we could talk in private. Nobody spoke as Ronnie drove us behind an old closed grocery store. We all got out of the truck. Dustin ended up backed up against a wall with the three of us facing him. “What the HELL do you think you’re doing?” I yelled. “We SAVED your ass, man, and you’re just going to run away? We KNOW you didn’t tell the cops; you just think you can hide or something?”

“You. . . you don’t understand, man,” he said.  “Those guys tried to KILL me!”
“And what?  You can’t go to the cops because you’re a damn stoner?” said Ronnie.  “Is that it?”  Dustin grabbed up a board from a broken pallet. 

“Leave me alone.” Dustin said, “I’ll handle this myself!” “And when those guys find out you’re still alive, and that WE saved you, what do you think they’re going to do, huh? They’ll come after US!” said Ronnie. An evil grin came onto Dustin’s face. “Not when I’m done with them, they won’t.” Mike ran toward him, and Dustin swung the board, breaking it across his head. Mike went down, splinters flying everywhere. Ronnie approached him, and got a shoe to the groin. Ronnie went down. I couldn’t believe what was happening. He was still holding a broken spike of the board. He came at me with it. I turned to run away – and ran right into the mirror of the truck. I fell backwards to the ground. My head pounded; my vision swam. I saw him standing over me. He was still grinning. He said, “It’s a shitty fucking truck, but it’ll get me back to Louisville, I guess. But you three have got to be shut up.” He changed his grip on the wooden spike. It was pointed down at me. Then, there was a blur, and splinters flew everywhere around his head. He fell down beside me. Ronnie was there, extending me a hand. He helped me up. We looked down at Dustin, and Ronnie said, “Teach you to call my truck a piece of shit, asshole!” Right after that, a cop car came around the corner. The siren went off and my heart sank. There was no running now. And when I saw the cop with his gun out, I did anything he told me to. Ronnie’s uncle had his aunt look up Dustin’s name, and when they didn’t like what they found, he had the cops on the look-out for Ronnie’s truck. The cops took us all downtown, and we all spilled our guts. I figured me, Ronnie and Mike were screwed, for sure. It seemed like it would never end. Then, it seemed that lunch suddenly appeared, and the local defense attorney was all jolly and happy. He said we’d be out by the end of the day. No charges, either. It turned out that Dustin had spilled far more than any of us had. He’d been dealing in Louisville, and turned in all his contacts. Two of those had decided to kill Dustin and deal his drugs themselves. The town cops were so happy with such a bust, they decided we three weren’t worth their time. Ronnie, Mike and I decided to find a different spot to camp from now on.